Best of Hoop Mom: Bench Behavior

In her 12th column, in May, 2003, Teresa Wippel offers thoughts on player bench behavior.

I was dismayed by the behavior I saw among a group of young girls sitting on the bench during a recent tournament game. They were screaming at the referee to call traveling on the opposing team’s players, jumping up to protest officials’ calls and otherwise demonstrating very unsportsmanlike conduct. Where do they learn this type of behavior?

Upset

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Dear Upset:

Unfortunately, this behavior is learned – from adults! Kids imitate what they see and let’s face it – we’ve all witnessed some out-of-control behavior among parents and coaches at youth sporting events.

When kids are on the bench, they should be watching the game and offering supportive comments to their teammates. It is not their place to be criticizing the calls of officials, heckling members of the opposing team or otherwise acting like poor sports.

Shame on the coach of the team you observed for allowing this behavior in the first place. He or she should be setting an example for the team by sternly rebuking any player who acts this way. But the responsibility also rests squarely on the shoulders of parents, who must take responsibility for monitoring their own behavior.

It isn’t easy. We’ve all gotten caught up in the momentum of expressing opinions about a bad call, and sometimes it truly does feel like the referee only sees traveling when the player committing it is wearing your team’s jersey!

But we are the adults, after all. And that means both coaches and parents must exhibit behavior that we want our kids to emulate.

Hoop Mom

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Teresa Wippel is team manager of the Warriors Basketball Club, a 5th Grade girls' team from the Seattle area, and mom to Warriors post player Amanda Waldron. In her other life, she is a freelance writer and editor. To ask Teresa a question, email her at

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