Dear Hoop Mom

In a new column for HoopGurlz.com, Teresa Wippel tackles the kind of basketball issues that require a mother's touch.

A few players from our team regularly attend sleepover birthday parties, even when they have games the next day. Their parents say that their daughters already miss a lot of social time with their friends due to basketball commitments, and they shouldn’t be forced to give up these parties, too. Of course, the girls are tired and yawning on the court. We have told our daughter no sleepovers on game weekends, but she is starting to pressure us to change our minds because the other girls are doing it. What should we do? Just sign us ...

Don’t Want to Be Sleepless in Seattle

Dear Don’t Want to Be Sleepless:
I don’t mean to be a sleepover scrooge here, but what ever happened to the old-fashioned two-hour birthday parties with cake and presents? Parents of athletes are constantly challenged to make tough decisions regarding these all-night parties. The peer pressure to attend is huge, especially when the kids are already sacrificing other social events because of regular basketball practices and games. But it’s a given that they will be exhausted and cranky the next day – not a good combination if you’re expected to perform on the court!

It’s been my experience that no matter what you do, kids will NOT get enough sleep when they are staying overnight with a large group of friends. It’s almost impossible to set an early bedtime during these events, because the kids usually come with the expectation of seeing how late they can stay up. To make matters worse, the party participants are usually gorging themselves on junk food and sodas most of the night.

You deserve a big pat on the back for laying down the law when it comes to sleepover parties before basketball games. Now you need to approach your coach and ask him or her to set a policy regarding sleepovers for the whole team to follow. I recommend a ban on pre-game sleepovers, with the understanding that players will see little or no playing time if they have participated in such an event the night before.

Putting the kibosh on sleepovers, by the way, doesn’t mean your daughter has to miss out entirely. In our family, when our kids are invited to a sleepover on the weekend of an athletic event, they know that they can attend the party but have to leave early – by 10 p.m., for example, so they can get a decent night’s sleep at home.

Hoop Mom

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Teresa Wippel is team manager of the Warriors Basketball Club, a 5th Grade girls' team from the Seattle area, and mom to Warriors post player Amanda Waldron. In her other life, she is a freelance writer and editor. To ask Teresa a question, email her at